I am so thankful to be alive to see my 44th
birthday! Life, even though hard at times, is better now than I could have ever
imagined. I cannot believe I had the audacity to try and kill myself a few
times. Yet I am extremely thankful to be in a place mentally where suicide is
nowhere in my thought process.
I am so thankful to be alive to see my 44th
birthday! 4 is my all-time favorite number so the fact that I am 44 years old
now means a heck of a lot to me. I did some research on the Biblical
significance of these numbers and found out that the period between Jesus'
crucifixion and his ascension was 44 days.
The number 4 derives its meaning from creation because on
the fourth day of what is called 'creation week' God completed the material
universe. On this day He brought into existence our sun, moon, and all the
stars (Genesis 1:14 - 19) whose purpose was to give off light.
It is so awesome that for 2019 God took me through the
process of getting rid of all the grime and dirt that had absolutely NOTHING to
do with me, in an effort to clean me up and allow me to really become the
woman, the servant, the mother, the BEING that He intended for me to be. I've never felt freer, more alive, more aware
and more authentic. I look forward to this journey of self-discovery and am
thankful that it has been confirmed within the meaning of the number 4. Here is
what I mean:
On the 4th day God completed the material / physical
universe. The spiritual realm was already in order, and then the physical had
to be completed. On a personal level I can relate to this because I am strong
and confident and whole in the Spirit. This was the first year ever where I
navigated solely on faith. TRANSLATION:
EVERY FRIGGIN DECISION quickly and suddenly worked for my good and to the glory
of God. My faith muscles got the workout of a lifetime this year and now it’s
time to move in confidence within this skin and this reality I find myself in. I
have the freedom (and a tad bit of wisdom) to learn from the things and people
and situations around me, whatever that may look like, whatever it may entail.
On the 4th day the light-bearing entities; sun, moon and
stars were spoken into existence. It's no coincidence that for this 44th
year I’ve been putting “aspiring beam of light” as my soul’s occupation. My
expectation is for the Lord to make me lighter and brighter, so I can shine for
His glory.
This is also the first year, at least since I was a wee
tyke, where I am not focused on relationships or romantic love. My heart's
desire is to get back to ministry and I'm allowing my Lord to have me all to Himself
so that this aspiring beam of light can shine without blockage, interference,
distractions or shadows.
I am so thankful to be alive to see my 44th
birthday! I am both a work in progress and masterpiece doing her best to MASTER
PEACE. For my 44th year this is what I decree:
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